On Father's Day

You've been a father for 11 years. What do you think about that? 

I feel old. And I'm still not very good at it.

What do you mean that you're still not very good at it? 

I still lose my patience too easily. I have a hard time making myself be interested in things my kids are interested in. 

Think back to when Cole was born. What did you think about becoming a father? 

To be honest, I remember it, but I don't think I had any deep thoughts about it. I was just initially like, "Okay, we've got a kid now. Let's see how it goes." And then it was just a lot of work, taking care of a baby.

Have you ever had that big "I'm a father!" moment? 

I don't think I ever had a big "I'm a father" moment. Just little moments. Like the first time he fell asleep on my chest or the first time he ate solid food and then all the little moments where he started to become a real person with a real personality. But they were all just little moments building on top of each other rather than one big grand reveal.

What is the most difficult part of fatherhood? 

Patience.

What is the most gratifying part of fatherhood?

When they choose to want to spend time with me and give up their own time.

Which is harder - being a husband or a father?

Being a father. Erin is an adult who behaves mostly rationally. Kids do not, and it doesn't matter how rational you are, they won't suddenly become more rational.

How do you feel being a father of only boys and how does that affect your parenting? 

In some ways it makes it easier because similar approaches work for all three of the boys. I don't have to differentiate as much. They have similar interests and similar activities and similar gross behavior. Sometimes I wonder if I had a girl how I would treat her differently or the same as the boys, but it's mostly just theoretical because I don't know.

What advice would you give to an expecting father?

I had a hard time connecting to the kids as babies, so my advice to a new father if they have that same problem would be to just be patient and keep trying because for me they became more real as they got older.